Minds of Men
by scooby2408
Summary: Tag to 05x13. Merlin sits by the Lake of Avalon while he waits for Arthur to return. Contains spoilers for the end of Merlin.


**A/N: This was inspired by the last scene of the series - this is my version of that modern-day epilogue scene with young!merlin rather than old!merlin.**

**WARNING: Contains major s****poilers for Merlin 05x11, 05x12, 05x13. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own BBC Merlin or any related themes or items. **

Minds of Men

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He lingered for a few more moments, keeping his eyes closed as he savoured the peace and quiet; the branches of the trees swaying in the breeze, the waters of the lake lapping at the shore, the soft bird song filling the air. It was peaceful here, and he could forget the chaos of the outside world.

Slowly, Merlin cracked one eye open and then the other. He squinted as the bright light of the sun reflected on the surface of the lake, temporarily blinding him. As his eyes adjusted, Merlin stretched out his arms and sat up, shuffling backwards to sit beneath the tree.

_'Clot-pole.' _

A sad smile graced Merlin's face as his thoughts returned to the memories that plagued his dreams. Arthur. Oh, how he missed him. There was not a single day that passed that Merlin felt the loss of his old, his best friend.

He missed them all. Leon. Percival. Gwaine. Gaius. Gwen. He had grieved for them; he had mourned for them, but they were all gone. They had been dead for centuries - his memories were all that he had of them.

He even, found himself mourning the loss of Morgana - the part of her that had been a good person, the kind-hearted woman that helped defend his small village or had wanted nothing more than to see the safe return of her serving maid; that was the friend that Merlin wanted to remember and not the cruel and heartless creature that replaced her. It was in the memory of that woman and the friendship that they had once shared that Merlin had returned to the spot where she had fallen, to bury her.

He had dug her grave without magic. Somehow, Merlin was sure, wherever she was, Morgana would've appreciated the irony.

There were times that he wanted to blame Kilgharrah, for everything that had happened to Morgana. Kilgharrah had told him repeatedly, ever since he found that Morgana shared his magical gifts, that she was evil and not to be trusted; that Morgana would bring Camelot's destruction. And Merlin took him at his word.

In truth Merlin knew that he was as much to blame for Morgana's fate. Over the years he had wondered what would have happened if he had made another choice. If he had been there for Morgana when she had been discovering her powers for the first time, and reaching out for someone who could understand her, she would not have readily turned to the whispers of Morgause. If he had not distanced himself from Mordred, the young knight might never have readily abandoned his king when his childhood sweetheart was executed for treason. If he had _only_ told Arthur that he had magic earlier, his friend might have lived beyond the Battle of Camlann.

It was too late for what ifs. Merlin understood that now.

His joints were still stiff from earlier, so he stretched again. Merlin's sudden movement jolted a headphone from his left ear; he plucked the other headphone from his ear and allowed them to dangle from his chest - the folk-pop song that he had been listening to was muffled against the material of his jacket.

Merlin stared out across the Lake of Avalon again. He often found himself by the Lake, watching over the waters that had taken many of his loved ones, was oddly comforting.

Arthur's passing had been the hardest to deal with; his death had cut raw across his heart. Merlin had spent so long dreaming of the world that Arthur would bring, hoping for the day that could tell his friend the truth and be finally accepted for whom he was, that to find those dreams scattered in ashes had been a bitter pill to swallow in those dark days and weeks that followed the Battle of Camlann.

He still savoured those last precious moments that he had with Arthur: his best friend dying in his arms and uttering two simple words, words that had stayed with Merlin; those two simple words had made everything that he had ever gone through in Camelot worth it.

He was proud of Arthur. He was damned proud of _his_ royal prat.

He knew in his heart of hearts that he would see his friend one day again - The Once and Future King would return when Albion, or Britain as it was know nowadays, had greatest need of him, and Merlin would wait patiently for that day to arrive.

With a wide grin on his face, Merlin reached for the book that he had been reading before he had fallen asleep. It was an old and battered re-edition that had seen far better days, found in a pokey little second-hand bookshop. The yellowing pages that curling at the edges of the book betraying its use in recent weeks.

Merlin thumbed through the book until he reached the last part that he had read, and couldn't help but smile at the irony of the words that stared back at him: _"when they came to the sword that the hand held, Sir Arthur took it up by the handles, and took it with him, and the arm and the hand went under the water." _**[1]**

He slipped a leaflet that he had picked up in town, about a particular upcoming TV family drama, to bookmark his place in the book before slipping it into his rucksack**.[2]**

Staring out at the waters of the Lake of Avalon once more, Merlin sighed, thinking briefly of the last conversation that he ever had with Kilgharrah by these shores. And he smiled.

"Arthur Pendragon, your story and mine, has and will always live _long_ in the minds of men."

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**A/N:**

**[1****] I was struck in that last episode the way that Kilgharrah said to Merlin at the end: 'The story that we have been a part of will live long in the minds of men.' And to a large extent I think the Great Dragon was right - the story of King Arthur and Camelot, the Knights of the Round Table and of course, Merlin, is for me, one of the most enduring British Legends. I wanted to tie a little bit of that theme in here so yes, the book that Merlin was reading is '****Le Morte d'Arthur' and the quote comes directly from the text.**

**[2] Sorry, I couldn't resist slipping this little nod to the show - I think it just brings full circle the whole idea that these characters and their adventures are part of this enduring story****.**

**Thanks for reading.**


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